The Thought That Counts
by Murasaki Kaida
Summary: RenRuk. Rukia just wants Renji to get better. Rated T to be safe.


Disclaimer: I don't own Bleach. It all belongs to Kubo Tite.

A/N: Written for Yankeerose69 at LJ with the prompt 'Nursing one back to health'. Beta'd by Lilmisfits8811. Please R&R!

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Renji blinked his eyes open groggily. Pain hammered in his temples – the first sign that maybe he'd overslept. He couldn't remember what day it was or what he was supposed to be doing. 

He wondered if maybe he'd gotten drunk and had lost his memory.

"Keep still."

Renji looked around. The blur was gradually fading from his eyes and he could see the familiar surroundings of his room at Urahara's store. The voice had been familiar, though he couldn't begin to think what anyone would be doing in his room.

"…huh?" His voice was cracked and he winced at how dry his throat was. He shifted – his legs snagging in the sheets of his futon – and tried to remember how to get up so that he could find water.

"Here." He felt the cool rim of a glass being pressed against his lower lip and Renji lifted his head to gulp down some refreshing, cool water. He spluttered as his greedy gulps sent some of the water down the wrong tube, "Careful!"

"…Rukia?" He rubbed at his forehead and looked around again. Finally, he noticed the figure in a pale blue sundress kneeling by the side of his futon, frowning down at him. She held the glass in one hand, a washcloth in the other. "How did ya get in my room?"

Rukia shook her head and dropped the damp, cool cloth onto Renji's forehead. He gasped, only just noticing how hot he felt, and reached up to hold the cloth in place. "Don't you remember anything?"

_Oh no_. Did that mean he really _had_ gotten drunk? He knew that sometimes when he got drunk he did stupid things – things he would rather forget about in the morning. Maybe he'd done that again and this time he'd forgotten, but Rukia was there to remind him of his embarrassment.

"Whatever I did I'm sorry," he said as quickly as he could around the slurring of his voice. Everything about him felt heavy and sluggish. He couldn't even make his tongue form sounds properly.

"As you should be," Rukia muttered. He yelped when she poured the last of what was in the glass onto the cloth on his head.

"Did I…did I do something really bad?" He asked cautiously, lifting the cloth away from one red eye so that he could try and gauge how big a thump she was going to give him.

"By 'really bad', you mean…?" She folded her arms haughtily.

Renji winced. _Not good_. "Did I…flash someone…like last time?"

Her large purple eyes widened. "_Flash_ someone? Who did you flash?"

"N-nothing!" Renji covered his eye again. "My mistake. What _did_ happen?"

"Renji."

"…hmm?"

"Who did you flash and why?"

He cursed his big mouth. "I was really drunk, Rukia – I had no idea what I was doing –"

"Renji."

"Nanao," he blurted. Just the memory of that made his face burn. It had been one of those slow-returning drunk memories that had left him unable to look her in the eye for weeks.

Rukia's voice was edged with steel. "Why would you flash Nanao even when drunk?"

"I dunno," he whined. "I wondered that myself when I remembered what I'd done."

"Well…either way," Rukia said, and he knew she was frowning without having to lift the cloth away from his eyes. "You're not here because you were drunk. There was a battle – arrancar. You got hurt."

"…does that mean I lost?"

"You didn't lose, but you got hurt," she sighed. She pulled the cloth off of his face and Renji grunted in surprise when a bright light suddenly blocked out his vision. "Sorry – checking your pupils for dilation. You were hit with some sort of poison. You got very feverish and hallucinogenic."

Hallucinogenic? Well, that was Rukia's way of saying 'you yelled out crazy shit we'd both rather forget'. He hoped he hadn't said anything too bad because he had a hard enough time living with Urahara as it was. If that guy got hold of any more fodder…

"I've been waiting for your fever to break for a while now," Rukia continued. "I think you're finally on the mend."

_For…a while?_ "How long was I out?"

"About two days."

Huh. Well, he couldn't be too annoyed about that because that was two days without having to do training and cleaning. But it was also two days of hallucinations and illness – all of which Rukia seemed to be saying she'd sat through.

"What was I…saying?" He asked, swallowing.

"All sorts," Rukia replied. A smirk tugged at the edges of her mouth. "You mentioned an umbrella, demanded taiyaki and at one point started screaming that you were naked."

"Oh god."

"You also said 'you really mean the world to me'…"

Oh _god_.

"…and I was worried, seeing as it was Ichigo you were talking to."

"WHAT?!"

Rukia nodded. "That was my reaction, too. But I thought I should be fair on you – there were mitigating circumstances, after all. You were in Chappy Land."

"Chappy…Land?" It was a strange time for his imagination to supply him with a vivid image, but he found himself picturing a world with white bunnies.

"Unless you really were professing your feelings to Ichigo."

"No way!" Renji couldn't find anything to throw, so he flopped himself around on the futon for a moment and glared at her. "Is this okay to ya? Mocking a sick man?"

Rukia grinned. "Speaking of sick men – it's high time that you ate, Renji." She picked up a bowl from beside her and the scent of steamed rice and vegetables made his nostrils twitch. Renji started to try and get up, but she stopped him. "Uh-uh. You're still not well and you shouldn't strain yourself."

She grabbed up some of the food with a set of chopsticks – and held it in front of his mouth. "Open up."

Renji stared at her. She had to be joking, right? He'd never been up to date on etiquette but he was fairly sure this wasn't the 'proper' way of doing things unless maybe you were in a hospital or something. Which technically…

No. This was just plain embarrassing – he could handle himself. No way was he going to let her feed him like he was a baby.

He shook his head.

Rukia frowned. "Don't be childish, Renji. You need sustenance so that your body can fight off whatever maladies it has left – "

"I can feed myself," Renji protested. "Just let me prop myself up and I can take the bowl – MMMPH!" He coughed as she jammed the rice into his mouth.

"You will stay where you are," she glared, bringing the chopsticks back to the bowl. "You have nothing to feel ashamed of."

"Rukia, I feel fine," Renji ground out. The rice tasted thick and chalky in his mouth and he swallowed with difficulty.

She shook her head, her black hair dusting her pale cheeks. "Why won't you let me take care of you?"

"Because I don't need it!"

She smiled, but it didn't quite reach her amethyst eyes. "You always take care of me, though."

Renji flushed. He really didn't want conversations like this when he was on his back after a fever and trying to dodge the chopsticks. He rubbed his forehead. "Don't always work though, does it?"

No, it didn't always work. Normally, Renji just ended up making things worse and then it was up to Ichigo to sort it out. Ichigo was the really strong one – the one who mended things. Saved people. Saved _Rukia_.

Man, he felt amazed he could stand to be in the same room as her considering the sheer bulk of his shame. The more he thought on every failed attempt at doing something right, the more ridiculous he felt – a walking parody of a man.

Rukia sighed and clasped the bowl with both hands. "Anyone could take care of another person in some way or another, for some reason or another." She looked at him, and her smile warmed her cool eyes. "And sometimes, even if someone didn't succeed – the reason why they did it and the fact that they tried is what matters. It's the thought that counts."

He hesitated. Man, he wished he was better with words and he wished her sentiments could wipe away his inferiority complex but he couldn't help it. He wanted to be everything that Ichigo had stepped in and become. He forced a chuckle. "Too bad ya ain't like that when it comes to birthdays."

Rukia moved so fast that she took him by surprise. One moment Renji was avoiding her gaze and the next, he felt the clumsy press of her lips to his. So inexperienced, awkward and sincere that he felt like every function of his body had stopped. Years of wishing and hoping flooded to the surface – danced around the place where they touched.

She pulled back, her cheeks as red as his hair. Renji's hand reached up – tried to stop her from moving away, only to fall with lethargy and uncertainty back to his side. She'd kissed him. _She _had willingly kissed _him_. That…that had to mean something, right?

"And that thought," Rukia said, clearing her throat, "will have to count until you've eaten. Because you won't be getting anything else out of me until then."

He grinned. Maybe he could stand to be fed just this once.


End file.
